Stabbing moments by Monica.
Yea and all of these include Jim and less than a 24 hour period, so lets not tell him.
“Does this need to be vacuumed up while you’re putting on your makeup?”
Yes, it may need to be vacuumed, but I am doing something, hate the sound of the vacuum, and no, you can not do it right now.
“Do we have time to get my car washed?”
Yes, when I told you should go get your car washed before getting dressed. The whole before time. Not the after time.
“Damn these people on the street don’t move as fast as the people on the highway” Ok, this in not a direct quote, but more of a mish mash of quotes complaining about the drivers on Madison Ave. That just happened to run pretty parallel to 290. Which 290 would have gotten us to where we were going much faster than Madison.
“I’m going to Home Depot, want to come?”
No. Every time we go to Home Depot we get in a fight. Jim is worse in Home Depot than an A.D.D. kid on sugar and caffeine in Disney Land. Today, he had a list of 3 or 4 items and he was at Home Depot for more than an hour and a half. What is he bringing home?
I have no idea.
Ok, that’s it on that. But I just had to complain. He has his reasoning behind his actions that makes no sense with any of mine, which makes perfect sense.
Kora ate about 10 rib bones on Wednesday. She knocked the garbage over, with the weight on the garbage can and ate out of it. Friday, she puked up the stinkiest funk ever at 3 am and we had to get up and clean it. Jim came home in the middle of the day to find Kora and Modeam on the bed together sleeping. It’s the guest bed, not our bed. We had locked Kora down in the kitchen. Jim believes that Modeam was watching over Kora dog.
I think that Modeam was just waiting for Kora to puke so he could eat it. I don’t think my cats are that compassionate.
I have $20 that says that Tracey is going to give birth on Monday that 13th. Freakish talking money, but never the less……… I still owe Tracey and Moody a rib dinner that I should sent out as soon so baby is born so you have some yummy food in the house when you don’t feel like leaving the house for 6 weeks.
THE BIGGEST CARROT EVER!!!Look what Jim found at work.
Even Pedro and Luigi think it's huge
Damn that's a big carrot.
“Why do men do that?”
I so have to quit going to thenest.com. These women complain about their husbands way too much and it got me thinking. The answer is usually, men are dumb and women think it’s their fault that men don’t understand. Ok, men aren’t always dumb, but they don’t see the big picture like women do.
Take Jim and the whole pasta pot incident. Where as I saw boiling water over flowing the pot and burning him in the groin, he thought he was doing it correctly. Of course I was right.
My ready to pop out that baby best friend, Tracey’s husband got miffed at her b/c he asked her to iron a shirt and then their apartment lost power. She was still able to iron the shirt before her husband left for work. They did get their power back. Really it was no harm no foul. He was trying to get her with the, but I asked you to iron my shirt yesterday, thing.
Ok, first off, don’t yell at a pregger woman who is about to pop. Secondly, men just don’t think about things. Yes, if it was my shirt and I had to get it ironed before work, I would be pissed that I lost power, but I would hope that the power would come back on. Or find excuses not to go into work. I would probably find excuses not to come into work.
Now, I wake up this cold snowy Sunday morning and find that I have no coffee. I was at the grocery store that has my good coffee just Friday and thought about buying coffee and I didn’t since I was sure we had coffee. Jim usually makes the coffee and he didn’t say we were almost out. Saturday, when I made a full pot, I used up all the coffee.
Now I could be mad at Jim for not reminding me to get more coffee. I could be mad at myself for not buying the coffee. Or I could just drink the cold dregs of the left over coffee pot.
I’m drinking the cold dregs.
Kora is so Jim's dog. He is her sun and moon. You know why? Cause Jim gives her food all the time. If Jim's eatting so is Kora.
But just can't deny this litte face!
Now I do have a good reason for getting so mad at Jim the other day in regards to the pasta cooker, boiling water, and our future kids.
On Sunday, Jim was making pasta with sausage with his new pasta pot and he was using it all wrong. He had the water boiling in the pot and was going to force the strainer filled with dry pasta, down into the boiling water. All I could imagine was boiling water overflowing the pot and splashing Jim in the groin area.
Then we would be spending our nice Sunday evening in the ER and not at home arguing about a stupid pasta pot.
My first boyfriend Chris was adopted. He told me that his father couldn’t have kids because he dumped, was the dumpee, boiling water all over his groin. As for this being 100% true, I have no idea. It’s possible, but at the same time when I was 16 I believed just about anything.
